thewookie1 Posted February 28, 2014 Report Share Posted February 28, 2014 (edited) FORWARDS Cody Hodgson ($4.250m) / Drew Stafford ($4.000m) Zemgus Girgensons ($0.894m) / Brian Flynn ($0.638m) Matt Ellis ($0.550m) / DEFENSEMEN Tyler Myers ($5.500m) / Christian Ehrhoff ($4.000m) Mike Weber ($1.667m) / GOALTENDERS Jhonas Enroth ($1.250m) BUYOUTS Ville Leino ($0.000m) Nathan Gerbe ($0.308m) BURIED Patrick Kaleta ($0.325m) SALARY CAP: $71,100,000; CAP PAYROLL: $23,381,666; BONUSES: $475,000 CAP SPACE (9-man roster): $47,718,334 Ok, so what are we going to do? We have enough cap room to sink a ship; a good deal of RFAs like Ennis, Adam, and McBain, not to mention the many odds and ends we have on the UFA side of things. This is as far as I could get...... with resigning some players Ott would get 5 or 6 mil for 1 year if he wished to be a rental again, then we could hold 50% and make him cheap for a team. Ennis I just matched Hodgson's deal. Foligno I just gave him a nice little raise as I did McNabb and Ruhwedal. To be honest I don't know what to do about Adam. We could try to sign Callahan and Girardi I guess, and/or Jagr/Alfersson/Phillips/any other vet.... FORWARDS Tyler Ennis ($4.250m) / Drew Stafford ($4.000m) Steve Ott ($5.000m) / Cody Hodgson ($4.250m) / Brian Flynn ($0.638m) Marcus Foligno ($1.250m) / Zemgus Girgensons ($0.894m) / Matt Ellis ($0.550m) / DEFENSEMEN Tyler Myers ($5.500m) / Christian Ehrhoff ($4.000m) Mike Weber ($1.667m) / Brayden McNabb ($1.050m) Chad Ruhwedel ($1.050m) / GOALTENDERS Jhonas Enroth ($1.250m) BUYOUTS Ville Leino ($0.000m) Nathan Gerbe ($0.308m) BURIED Patrick Kaleta ($0.325m) SALARY CAP: $71,100,000; CAP PAYROLL: $35,981,666; BONUSES: $475,000 CAP SPACE (14-man roster): $35,118,334 Edited February 28, 2014 by thewookie1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hoss Posted February 28, 2014 Report Share Posted February 28, 2014 O K Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thewookie1 Posted February 28, 2014 Author Report Share Posted February 28, 2014 O K The format is fixed now, for some reason it went crazy when I posted..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hoss Posted February 28, 2014 Report Share Posted February 28, 2014 (edited) I think there's a decent chance that we land Callahan, but the type of free agent that I expect us to go after are guys like Milan Michalek, Devin Setoguchi, Radim Vrbata, Lee Stempniak, Brian Boyle and Marcel Goc. These are guys that could be had on one or two year deals that Buffalo will look to sign to fill the gaps in between now and the time prospects are ready. Could try to pick up Orpik, Zidlicky, Salo, Willie Mitchell or Robidas (or a similar vet) to a short deal as they bridge the gap to Zadorov/McCabe/Risto. Especially if Myers, Ehrhoff or Weber are moved at the deadline or in the offseason. Could see them try to pickup Steve Downie. He's kind of like Ott, but will come cheaper and is a young veteran (26 years old but has been in the league for eight years). He's had injury problems, but he probably won't cost much at all. Edited February 28, 2014 by Tankalicious Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ghost of Dwight Drane Posted February 28, 2014 Report Share Posted February 28, 2014 Forwards: Lenny Bruce........George Carlin......Richard Pryor Dennis Miller......Robin Williams.....Rodney Dangerfield Don Rickles........Flip Wilson........Sam Kinison Henny Youngman.....Jerry Seinfeld.....Garry Shandling Defense: Redd Foxx......Louie C.K. Eddie Murphy...Chris Rock Steve Martin...Richard Lewis Goalie: Bill Cosby Bob Newhart Healthy Scratch: Steven Wright, Dave Chappelle Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
X. Benedict Posted February 28, 2014 Report Share Posted February 28, 2014 (edited) Forwards: Lenny Bruce........George Carlin......Richard Pryor Dennis Miller......Robin Williams.....Rodney Dangerfield Don Rickles........Flip Wilson........Sam Kinison Henny Youngman.....Jerry Seinfeld.....Garry Shandling Defense: Redd Foxx......Louie C.K. Eddie Murphy...Chris Rock Steve Martin...Richard Lewis Goalie: Bill Cosby Bob Newhart Healthy Scratch: Steven Wright, Dave Chappelle Flip Wilson as third line center? As long as he plays it as Geraldine. I don't want Richard Lewis on my team, or Dennis Miller , I'm trading them for Bill Hicks, and Woody Allen. PA is going to want Buddy Hacket on this roster, and Shadling is soft in corners, so Dice Clay or at least someone with a little grit. Lewis Black........ And Henny Youngman.....geez, might as well bring in Burns and Hope and will make it the Carnation Hour Line. Edited February 28, 2014 by X. Benedict Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Weave Posted February 28, 2014 Report Share Posted February 28, 2014 Can we get through the trade deadline first? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shrader Posted February 28, 2014 Report Share Posted February 28, 2014 Forwards: Lenny Bruce........George Carlin......Richard Pryor Dennis Miller......Robin Williams.....Rodney Dangerfield Don Rickles........Flip Wilson........Sam Kinison Henny Youngman.....Jerry Seinfeld.....Garry Shandling Defense: Redd Foxx......Louie C.K. Eddie Murphy...Chris Rock Steve Martin...Richard Lewis Goalie: Bill Cosby Bob Newhart Healthy Scratch: Steven Wright, Dave Chappelle There are too many guys on this roster who are still alive. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tom webster Posted February 28, 2014 Report Share Posted February 28, 2014 Forwards: Lenny Bruce........George Carlin......Richard Pryor Dennis Miller......Robin Williams.....Rodney Dangerfield Don Rickles........Flip Wilson........Sam Kinison Henny Youngman.....Jerry Seinfeld.....Garry Shandling Defense: Redd Foxx......Louie C.K. Eddie Murphy...Chris Rock Steve Martin...Richard Lewis Goalie: Bill Cosby Bob Newhart Healthy Scratch: Steven Wright, Dave Chappelle No way Steven Wright is a healthy scratch on my team. He has got to get quality minutes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
X. Benedict Posted February 28, 2014 Report Share Posted February 28, 2014 No way Steven Wright is a healthy scratch on my team. He has got to get quality minutes. I want him on my PP unit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ubkev Posted February 28, 2014 Report Share Posted February 28, 2014 Forwards: Lenny Bruce........George Carlin......Richard Pryor Dennis Miller......Robin Williams.....Rodney Dangerfield Don Rickles........Flip Wilson........Sam Kinison Henny Youngman.....Jerry Seinfeld.....Garry Shandling Defense: Redd Foxx......Louie C.K. Eddie Murphy...Chris Rock Steve Martin...Richard Lewis Goalie: Bill Cosby Bob Newhart Healthy Scratch: Steven Wright, Dave Chappelle You're seperating Kinison and Dangerfield? Are you out of your mind? This is just madness. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dudacek Posted February 28, 2014 Report Share Posted February 28, 2014 Williams is too much of a loose cannon to trust with second line minutes. And Seinfeld on the fourth line will be dressing room poison, you know I'm right. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drunkard Posted February 28, 2014 Report Share Posted February 28, 2014 Forwards: Lenny Bruce........George Carlin......Richard Pryor Dennis Miller......Robin Williams.....Rodney Dangerfield Don Rickles........Flip Wilson........Sam Kinison Henny Youngman.....Jerry Seinfeld.....Garry Shandling Defense: Redd Foxx......Louie C.K. Eddie Murphy...Chris Rock Steve Martin...Richard Lewis Goalie: Bill Cosby Bob Newhart Healthy Scratch: Steven Wright, Dave Chappelle I can't believe you left off Dave Attell. He's a top 6 guy for sure. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PASabreFan Posted February 28, 2014 Report Share Posted February 28, 2014 Ghost, you have too many mic-hogs at center. Miller, Rickles, they'll tear the lockerroom apart if they don't get their chances. You need more straight men down the middle to distribute the laughs. Ed McMahon is your clear number one center — but we know he's going to miss a lot of time. So Doc Severinsen is your 1 A. I know, he's not your classic comedian, but he has good instincts. I like the stout Andy Richter as your third line center. For the fourth line, Jack Benny likes this kid out of Rochester. I can't think of his name right now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
X. Benedict Posted February 28, 2014 Report Share Posted February 28, 2014 Ghost, you have too many mic-hogs at center. Miller, Rickles, they'll tear the lockerroom apart if they don't get their chances. You need more straight men down the middle to distribute the laughs. Ed McMahon is your clear number one center — but we know he's going to miss a lot of time. So Doc Severinsen is your 1 A. I know, he's not your classic comedian, but he has good instincts. I like the stout Andy Richter as your third line center. For the fourth line, Jack Benny likes this kid out of Rochester. I can't think of his name right now. Lou Costello was the Selke winner for straight men for how many years. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shrader Posted February 28, 2014 Report Share Posted February 28, 2014 Ghost, you have too many mic-hogs at center. Miller, Rickles, they'll tear the lockerroom apart if they don't get their chances. You need more straight men down the middle to distribute the laughs. Ed McMahon is your clear number one center — but we know he's going to miss a lot of time. So Doc Severinsen is your 1 A. I know, he's not your classic comedian, but he has good instincts. I like the stout Andy Richter as your third line center. For the fourth line, Jack Benny likes this kid out of Rochester. I can't think of his name right now. Homophobe! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gramps Posted February 28, 2014 Report Share Posted February 28, 2014 While we're at it, Michael Richards as GM and Christopher Lloyd as head coach ... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Taro T Posted February 28, 2014 Report Share Posted February 28, 2014 Forwards: Lenny Bruce........George Carlin......Richard Pryor Dennis Miller......Robin Williams.....Rodney Dangerfield Don Rickles........Flip Wilson........Sam Kinison Henny Youngman.....Jerry Seinfeld.....Garry Shandling Defense: Redd Foxx......Louie C.K. Eddie Murphy...Chris Rock Steve Martin...Richard Lewis Goalie: Bill Cosby Bob Newhart Healthy Scratch: Steven Wright, Dave Chappelle Miller on LEFT wing? :huh: Lewis is a wuss. Steve Allen should get his spot. Wright should go in as backup goalie. The cerebral ones do fine there. Move Cosby to C; Newhart's short but starter material. Bump Seinfeld to wing and put Cosby there. Shandling can suck eggs in the minors; he should never have been more than an injury vacation fill in. Put either Allan Sherman or Dennis Leary in the press box pushing the starters, and THEN you have a contender. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PASabreFan Posted February 28, 2014 Report Share Posted February 28, 2014 Larry David is neurotic enough to be a goalie. He could reprise the role of Al Smith. Larry could skate out, look at the crowd, say, "nah" and waive goodbye to Terry. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brawndo Posted February 28, 2014 Report Share Posted February 28, 2014 Miller on LEFT wing? :huh: That is awesome!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
johnnychemo Posted February 28, 2014 Report Share Posted February 28, 2014 Forwards: Lenny Bruce........George Carlin......Richard Pryor Dennis Miller......Robin Williams.....Rodney Dangerfield Don Rickles........Flip Wilson........Sam Kinison Henny Youngman.....Jerry Seinfeld.....Garry Shandling Defense: Redd Foxx......Louie C.K. Eddie Murphy...Chris Rock Steve Martin...Richard Lewis Goalie: Bill Cosby Bob Newhart Healthy Scratch: Steven Wright, Dave Chappelle Gotta get some grit on the 2nd line, or they won't get any respect. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
X. Benedict Posted February 28, 2014 Report Share Posted February 28, 2014 (edited) Gotta get some grit on the 2nd line, or they won't get any respect. I'm hearing from the Canadians....they are willing to trade Norm McDonald for Miller, we have to throw in Silverman from the farm system though. I think we counter with Miller and Belzer and see if they bite. Edited February 28, 2014 by X. Benedict Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andrew Amerk Posted March 1, 2014 Report Share Posted March 1, 2014 Where is Mitch Hedberg? IR? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
... Posted March 1, 2014 Report Share Posted March 1, 2014 The entire second line becomes the third line. Because I would only send out Bill Hicks as the second line. The first line is there to soften them up. Wright starts on my team; you can show R. Lewis and Wilson the door for cap room. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PASabreFan Posted March 1, 2014 Report Share Posted March 1, 2014 Can Sinbad fight? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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