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[OT] Random Observations


shrader

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I just got an email that I couldn't help but laugh at, so I figured I'd start this thread. I'm looking for some random event in your daily life that you get a good laugh out of. I don't know of any good forum to share this kind of stuff, so I'll give it a shot. It's not complaint thursday, but it's worth a shot.

 

So anyway, the email I got was from a doctor named "Joe Hung" (and no, it wasn't some spam adult enhancement email). Yeah, it's pretty juvenile, but I had to laugh at it. Evidentally I'm about to be published on the same paper as "Joe Hung". That might just be my moment of glory.

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There is there big fat rude lady that rides the train with me everyday. She is extra ignorant. The other day I saw the train doors close as she was running onto the train and she bounced off of them causing her to miss the train. Usually its the same people on the train everyday and this lady has a reputation as being a queen B. i was laughing to myself when I looked up and saw like 5 other people laughing outloud. We all shared a moment of laughter and then went back to our normal routine. Just thought I'd share.

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There is there big fat rude lady that rides the train with me everyday. She is extra ignorant. The other day I saw the train doors close as she was running onto the train and she bounced off of them causing her to miss the train. Usually its the same people on the train everyday and this lady has a reputation as being a queen B. i was laughing to myself when I looked up and saw like 5 other people laughing outloud. We all shared a moment of laughter and then went back to our normal routine. Just thought I'd share.

I got a chuckle out of that as well.

 

Ok, here's something. Every husband and wife married couple (I can't believe I have to qualify that these days) will have a certain quirk about each other that they will remind each other from time to time, no matter how many years they've been married.

 

Husband: newlyweds take a shopping trip through Walden Galleria. Husband wants to check out certain products from Bath & Body Works so he can get them for his new bride. Husband can't smell the apple hand lotion, so he squeezes a bit harder to get a whiff. The stuff accidentally shoots up the husband's nose, and hubby in embarrassment has to clean out his nose. To add insult to injury, another guy walks up to him and says, "Can you do that again. I want to show my wife."

 

Wife: Husband gets deployed to Kosovo several years ago. Husband buys a jewelry box that is specially crafted due to its simple yet puzzle-like anti-theft openings (sort of like a Rubik's Cube). Husband mails jewelry box home, and wife takes it to work. Wife is enamored by it, and shows her co-workers how pretty it is. At the same time, she can't get it open. She passes it off to other people who also don't have a clue on how to open it. Finally, the owner/newspaper editor toys around with it, figures it out, and gets the box opened without having to pry it open to break it. The owner goes around and brags to everyone in the office that he figured it out.

 

Needless to say, husband and wife like to remind each other from time to time of these "shortcomings".

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My dog (4 pound Yorkie) eats my wifes hair off of the floor sometimes. Today she took a dump (my dog,not my wife) and the hair was stuck all through it and didn't come all the way out of her. The dog freiked out and started running aroung the yard with a string a crap balls hanging from her. She looked like a wedding limo with cans tied to the back bumper.

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My dog (4 pound Yorkie) eats my wifes hair off of the floor sometimes. Today she took a dump (my dog,not my wife) and the hair was stuck all through it and didn't come all the way out of her. The dog freiked out and started running aroung the yard with a string a crap balls hanging from her. She looked like a wedding limo with cans tied to the back bumper.

I hate when that happens.

 

Especially when master won't give me the benefit of a reach***squirrel***

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My dog (4 pound Yorkie) eats my wifes hair off of the floor sometimes. Today she took a dump (my dog,not my wife) and the hair was stuck all through it and didn't come all the way out of her. The dog freiked out and started running aroung the yard with a string a crap balls hanging from her. She looked like a wedding limo with cans tied to the back bumper.

Before my dog passed away, we were trying to give her anything & everything to make her eat. My wife made a mix of vegetables & stuff, including corn. Apparently, corn doesn't exactly digest in a dog's stomach, so when she pooped, it came out whole...amongst the rest of the bm. Thus, it looked like confetti poop. Freakiest thing I've ever seen.

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Before my dog passed away, we were trying to give her anything & everything to make her eat. My wife made a mix of vegetables & stuff, including corn. Apparently, corn doesn't exactly digest in a dog's stomach, so when she pooped, it came out whole...amongst the rest of the bm. Thus, it looked like confetti poop. Freakiest thing I've ever seen.

 

Now you have me picturing fireworks shooting out of the back of an animal. What can I say, it's a slow day here at work.

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My dog (4 pound Yorkie) eats my wifes hair off of the floor sometimes. Today she took a dump (my dog,not my wife) and the hair was stuck all through it and didn't come all the way out of her. The dog freiked out and started running aroung the yard with a string a crap balls hanging from her. She looked like a wedding limo with cans tied to the back bumper.

Outstanding.

 

Here's one: on the street in front of my office building, two dudes are building a mini-playground, complete with white picket fence, rubber ground covers, swings and slide. It's small enough to fit into a parking space that a big SUV would fill, but still: it's a city street in NYC. WTF is going on?

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Outstanding.

 

Here's one: on the street in front of my office building, two dudes are building a mini-playground, complete with white picket fence, rubber ground covers, swings and slide. It's small enough to fit into a parking space that a big SUV would fill, but still: it's a city street in NYC. WTF is going on?

 

This morning I saw these people that had rolled out about a square yard of sod onto the sidewalk. They put two lawn chairs on top and had signs that said "city park for a day". It was one of the stranger things I've noticed around here... and that includes the begger wearing a pirate hat.

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It must be a primary day here in Boston because there are "... for Mayor" signs all over the place. I saw a big van covered in "Menino for Mayor" signs this morning parked right in front of a fire hydrant. I wonder if it was a part of some evil plot to take votes away from him.

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I've got an observation.

 

When did people become so rude?

 

I go to the mall and these kiosk sales guys are physically walking in front of me asking me if I need a new cell phone. No I don't. Did I give you the appearance I was remotely interested?

 

I'm going through a light yesterday and an older man coming the other way to make a left turn literally yells obscenities at me out of his car, because apparently I wasn't going through the intersection fast enough (never mind the minivan the four cars in front of me that were dictating my speed...). Sorry I was holding you up you indignant prick.

 

I walk through my alumni union at RIT to get lunch, both yesterday and today. A group of sorority girls have a table set up advertising an annual event, a charity tug of war tournament. Both days I've done the "not interested in talking to you" walk passed the table (you guys know the walk I'm talking about). Both days I've been pestered by them about whether I'm going and why I'm not going. Why? Why do you have to bother me when I clearly don't want to speak to you? "Are you going to Mud Tug?!" Instead of brushing them off with some dressed up B.S. answer, I simply stopped and said "Nope." "Why not??" "Because I don't care." *insert offended scowls here* Oh, I'm sorry, were you not expecting me to say that after you rudely interrupted me?

 

Learn some manners people. Seriously.

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I work in downtown Pittsburgh and I'm sure you've all heard about the dumb G-20 summit thing going on this week... TOTAL PAIN... but anyway... There are protestors and demonstrators near Point State Park and one of them has a big sign that says "COAL: Dirty, Dangerous and Outdated" among other dumb things... anyway, many are there for the environment and the funny thing is they are setting up a huge stage and all sorts of stuff and they all come in on HUGE trucks and they bring these generators that look like they could power half the city... what do all these items run on, rainbows? No, gasoline or diesel... these are the same people who don't want to pollute the environment and complain about cars and whatnot... morons.

 

One other funny observation was a group of about 7 people sitting in a circle, a close circle not really spaced out, and they had a microphone talking to eachother. They weren't talking to the general public they were only talking to eachother but they had a microphone passing it around to one another. It wasn't loud outside, they didn't need the mircrophone but were using it anyway... the speaker was just loud enought to hear themselves so it's not like they wanted the public to hear them... but they were still using the microphone... we were like, WTF?

 

also, these protestor groups are saying they want to "disrupt the summit because...." when really all they want is to get on tv and get publicity for their cause. That's fine, but just say that... don't say you want to disrupt the summit because that's not going to happen, those leaders are going to sit up in the meetings and go about their business and they won't notice you one bit, so they really aren't disrupting the actual summit at all. All they are doing is screwing up the city and making the city waste money on more security, cops, etc... Just say you are there to get publicity for your cause, even if I don't agree with your cause I will respect you more for stating that than if you say you want to 'disrupt the summit'... ridculous.

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My dog (4 pound Yorkie) eats my wifes hair off of the floor sometimes. Today she took a dump (my dog,not my wife) and the hair was stuck all through it and didn't come all the way out of her. The dog freiked out and started running aroung the yard with a string a crap balls hanging from her. She looked like a wedding limo with cans tied to the back bumper.

 

oh goodness, now that is funny.

 

Whoo, anyhow, I like cat breath and oddly enough, I have a cat where all you have to do is scratch it's back and it starts licking. My wife saw me smelling the breath as it licked my nose and she freaked..."that is the most disgusting thing".....i was rolling on the floor laughing

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