PASabreFan Posted May 22, 2016 Report Share Posted May 22, 2016 With apologies to Nick Bakay (and to 2004) Starting outTrump: Got a small $1,000,000 loan from his fatherTPegs: Got a small $7,500 loan from his familyAdvantage: TrumpFirst jobTrump: Collected soda bottles on his millionaire father's development sitesTPegs: Worked in a coal mine after schoolAdvantage: TrumpCollegeTrump: PennTPegs: Penn State-ScrantonAdvantage: PushMade a fortuneTrump: By figuratively raping the skyTPegs: By literally raping the earthAdvantage: TPegsTendency for evilTrump: If I want to make more money, I'll conduct Hunger Games in Appalachia and put them on pay per view TVTPegs: If I want to make more money, I'll drill another gas well, using the tears of Buffalo sports fans as a fracking liquidAdvantage: TPegsTax returnsTrump: Isn't worried; he has great, the best, the most amazing tax peopleTPegs: Is worried; not sure that Cliff should have taken Bugles as a business expenseAdvantage: TrumpWivesTrump: Married a supermodel immigrant from SloveniaTPegs: Married a superhot orphan from KoreaAdvantage: Trump (and that will teach Smell to mock my food porn)Hair rumorTrump: Combover is hiding a scar from skin flap surgeryTPegs: Part is hiding a scar from skull birth defect surgeryAdvantage: TPegsBlusterTrump: You'll get tired of winningTPegs: We'll win a Cup, and then win another oneAdvantage: PushPolitically incorrect quipsTrump: "Megyn had blood coming out of her eyes, blood coming out of her..."TPegs: "Mayor Brown, Ted Black... Ted Black, Mayor Brown... isn't something backwards here?!"Advantage: TrumpManagement styleTrump: Loves to say, "You're fired"TPegs: Never fired anyone, then started firing everyoneAdvantage: TrumpCribTrump: Palacial estate Mar-a-LargoTPegs: Double-wide in BocaAdvantage: TPegs (no need for foreign grounds crew; Kim uses a push mower)MulligansTrump: Went bankrupt four timesTPegs: Missed playoffs five timesAdvantage: TPegsNicknameTrump: The DonaldTPegs: TPegsAdvantage: TrumpAmbitionTrump: Wants to be leader of the free worldTPegs: Wants to create hockey heaven on earthAdvantage: TPegsCriesTrump: At the sight of Carly Fiorina's faceTPegs: At the sight of Gilbert Perreault's faceAdvantage: TPegsArt of the dealTrump: Tried to buy the Buffalo BillsTPegs: Bought the Buffalo BillsAdvantage: Uh...And The Tale of the Tape goes to... OK, I don't really know how these things end. But this one looks like a tie. Member measurement for all the marbles! Advantage: Trump. Have you seen the size of his hands? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sabres Fan in NS Posted May 22, 2016 Report Share Posted May 22, 2016 Best one-liner nicknames of opponents: Trump: Lyin' Ted and Crooked Hillary. TPegs: ????? Advantage: This is too easy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
inkman Posted May 22, 2016 Report Share Posted May 22, 2016 Best one-liner nicknames of opponents: Trump: Lyin' Ted and Crooked Hillary. TPegs: ????? Advantage: This is too easy. Are you a trump supporter? Do you have to be to find this funny? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sabres Fan in NS Posted May 22, 2016 Report Share Posted May 22, 2016 Are you a trump supporter? Do you have to be to find this funny? No. No. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PASabreFan Posted May 22, 2016 Author Report Share Posted May 22, 2016 No. No. Come on, admit it. You've never wanted to return the U.S. again anyway. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sabres Fan in NS Posted May 22, 2016 Report Share Posted May 22, 2016 Come on, admit it. You've never wanted to return the U.S. again anyway. :w00t: I'll help build that wall, but you would think it would bother him more that I committed the unthinkable and voluntarily gave up my US citizenship. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
K-9 Posted May 22, 2016 Report Share Posted May 22, 2016 Tears of Buffalo fans as a fracking liquid. That is inspired humor right there. Well done, PA. GO SABRES!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
inkman Posted May 22, 2016 Report Share Posted May 22, 2016 :w00t: I'll help build that wall, but you would think it would bother him more that I committed the unthinkable and voluntarily gave up my US citizenship. I'd think about it if Canada hadn't banned me for life. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sabres Fan in NS Posted May 22, 2016 Report Share Posted May 22, 2016 I'd think about it if Canada hadn't banned me for life. I'll sneak you in, my friend. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hank Posted May 23, 2016 Report Share Posted May 23, 2016 Very funny. As a Sabres fan and US citizen I laughed out loud. As a Pagula worshipper and semi-supporter of Trump, YOU!!! Well done... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
That Aud Smell Posted May 23, 2016 Report Share Posted May 23, 2016 Wives Trump: Married a supermodel immigrant from Slovenia TPegs: Married a superhot orphan from Korea Advantage: Trump (and that will teach Smell to mock my food porn) :w00t: This was legitimately funny stuff -- worthy of keeping company with prior contributions that now belong to the PA catalog. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PASabreFan Posted May 23, 2016 Author Report Share Posted May 23, 2016 :w00t: This was legitimately funny stuff -- worthy of keeping company with prior contributions that now belong to the PA catalog. A "First wife" entry did not make it past the legal team. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
That Aud Smell Posted May 23, 2016 Report Share Posted May 23, 2016 A "First wife" entry did not make it past the legal team. That would actually be a fairly interesting competition. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PASabreFan Posted May 23, 2016 Author Report Share Posted May 23, 2016 Very funny. As a Sabres fan and US citizen I laughed out loud. As a Pagula worshipper and semi-supporter of Trump, ###### YOU!!! Well done... Thanks! (I think.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neo Posted May 23, 2016 Report Share Posted May 23, 2016 Creative and fun ... well done. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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