\GoBillsInDallas/ Posted December 12, 2006 Report Share Posted December 12, 2006 :nana: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eleven Posted December 13, 2006 Report Share Posted December 13, 2006 :nana: Here's the official article, if anyone cares: THE MEADOWLANDS, New Jersey (AP) Dec. 12, 2006 The Buffalo Sabres have scratched center Chris Drury for tonights game against the New Jersey Devils because of a recurrent bout of cooties--that's right, cooties. Drury, a Stanley Cup winner with the 2000-01 Colorado Avalanche, is thought to have originally contracted the disease when a member of the United States Little League World Series Championship team in 1989. Reportedly, after the championship game, he held hands with one Susie Jenkins, of Bridgeport, Conn., and as a result, contracted the benign but socially unpopular disease. After years of remission, the cooties emerged again. "Drury is a Cootie," chanted Amala Jackson, then 12, at the time of the incident. Some kids today respect Drury a little more: "Who cares if he's a Cootie carrier?" asked Jimmy Goulet, a seventh grade student at Bridgeport Junior High. "He's a pro hockey player, and he's got a championship ring." Others are not so secure. "My dad told me to stay away from Chris Drury, and other guys who might have Cooties, and other guys his age, and in fact, guys, period," said Mary Starks, 14, a freshman at Bridgeport High. Her father, Hartford doctor Henry Starks, brandished a shotgun when approached for this article. "Get the f*ck off my driveway," Dr. Starks said, before turning back into his home. Dr. Leslie Nicholson of the Johns Hopkins Medical Center stated that Drury's case likely is not serious. "Cooties can be cured through several courses of treatment," Dr. Nicholson said. The most popular, according to Dr. Nicholson, is a rite of passage involving having one's tighty-whities violently pulled up by a colleague. Another, and less expensive, treatment involves something Dr. Nicholson called a "purple nurple." Dr. Nicholson declined to explain further. Sabres head coach Lindy Ruff expects Drury to return to the lineup shortly, and without a conditioning assignment to the team's farm club in Rochester, New York. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PASabreFan Posted December 13, 2006 Report Share Posted December 13, 2006 Oh my God. I totally bought it. You booger! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
X. Benedict Posted December 13, 2006 Report Share Posted December 13, 2006 Let's hope Drury doesn't need a "purple nurple." A purple nurple is as much the disease as it is the cure. God Bless you, Captain Clutch. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Doohickie Posted December 13, 2006 Report Share Posted December 13, 2006 OT:::: GoBills- did you go to the Bills game in Houston? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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