Sabre Dance
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OK, here's another. Also long, but pretty funny:
An older couple are sitting on their patio one beautiful spring morning having breakfast. As they're lingering over a second cup of
coffee, Marie turns to her husband and says, "John, if I were to die, would you remarry?"
John puts his coffee cup down and looks aghast at his wife. "Now, Marie, we're sitting here on this beautiful spring morning enjoying
this wonderful breakfast you prepared and you ask a question like that out of the blue? This isn't the right time or place for that
question, so I'm not going to answer."
Marie relents, but brings the same question up later in the day. Again, John refuses to answer. Marie asks John the same question
the next day; John still won't answer. Finally, on the third day, John finally gives in.
"Marie, you know I love you very much and I would be heartbroken if you were to pass away before me. It would take a very long time,
but eventually, I think I would re-marry."
Marie looks intently at her husband and says, "Well, if you did re-marry, would you and your new wife live here in our house?"
John's brows furrow as he answers, "Well, we've lived happily in this house all these many years. It holds such wonderful memories
that I don't think I would want to live anywhere else. So, yes, I would live here with my new wife."
Marie goes on, "Would you and your new wife sleep in our bed, or would you buy a new mattress?"
John replies, "I know that is a very personal issue, but it is such a comfortable mattress that I think I would not buy a new one."
Exasperated, Marie finally blurts out, "Would you even let your new wife play golf with my golf clubs?"
John says, "Of course not! She’s left-handed!".
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This is my all-time favorite joke - sorry, it is a bit lengthy:
A fellow from the big city is out driving through farm country. He passes innumerable farms, all looking pretty much the same. Then, he goes by a farm with a pen out in front of the farmhouse. In the pen is a pig, and as the fellow drives by, he can see the pig is hobbling around on what appears to be a wooden leg.
Well, curiosity gets the better of the fellow, so he pulls into the driveway of the farm. Sure enough, the pig in the pen has a handsomely carved wooden leg strapped to it's right hindquarter. The fellow now just HAS to find out about this pig. He goes up to the farmhouse door and knocks.
The farmer comes to the door and the fellow says, "Hi - I'm sorry to bother you, but I was driving by and I saw your pig. I've never seen a pig with a wooden leg before and I was just wondering what happened."
The farmer says, "We get people stopping all the time to ask - I'll tell you, that is no ordinary pig. That pig is a bona fide hero. Two years ago, my three year old was out back playing by the pond, which she wasn't supposed to be doing. She fell in and of course couldn't swim. That pig heard the splashing, ran back to the pond and jumped in. He swam over to my daughter, grabbed her collar in his mouth and dragged her back to shore. Then he squealed like crazy until we ran back to help. He saved my daughter's life!"
"Wow! That's incredible!", the city fellow says.
The farmer went on, "That's not all. Last year, after everyone was in bed, there was a small electrical fire in the kitchen. Our smoke alarm malfunctioned and never went off. That pig smelled the smoke, started squealing and kept butting his head up against the kitchen door until he broke the lock. He ran in and up the stairs, still squealing like mad. He woke everyone up, then led us through the smoke down the stairs and out to safety. He saved everyone's lives that night!"
The city fellow said, "That's amazing! But, tell me....how did he get the wooden leg?"
The farmer said,"Well, a pig like that you don't eat all at one time."
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1 hour ago, matter2003 said:
Best pizza I ever had was at Giordano's in Chicago so I definitely disagree. The only pizza that had to be eaten with a knife and fork it was so thick...like a pie.
After having actual Chicago deep dish pizza in Chicago for the first time, I wrote a poem. It was called "In Chicago, They Eat Their Pizza with a Knife and Fork". I kid you not. I don't remember the rest of the poem, though.
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On 8/16/2018 at 10:06 AM, Sakman said:
For me, Bocce's pizza is an almost spiritual experience.
A couple years ago I was made aware of Imperial Pizza in South Buffalo. I sought it out. It's righteous. Now we figure out how to make stops there in or out of travels from the Southern Tier to Niagara County. For me, it's now up there with Bocce's in the 'heavenly' echelon of pizza pies.
I haven't found any pizza quite that good in all my travels in various states and countries. But I'll keep looking.
Imperial is very close to my home and it's where I go for pizza, wings and subs. All are pretty great (the meat on the subs is nearly 2 inches thick - you can hardly take a full bite).
6 hours ago, Sakman said:Also in Williamsville across the street from North High School. Same owner, pies are identical tasting.
My Mom and Dad went to Bocce's on Bailey when they were dating in the early 60's and there were still bocce ball courts next to it. My Dad went there so much the owner had him behind the counter to have a beer on more than one occasion. Now he goes to the Williamsville branch so often the owner knows him. He's the son of the original owner. When my Dad told him he knew his Dad and mentioned he had been behind the counter to have a beer with him the son's eye's widened and said "I remember the old man used to do that sometimes!"
Although I love Bocce's, their consistency has suffered a bit in recent years. Occasional over-cooking.
You gotta try Imperial Pizza on Abbot Road (near Patrick Kane's home as I understand it) sometime if Bocce's is your favorite. It's different, but just as good in the same ways.
The place that is now Imperial used to be a Bocce Club location some years back. Their pizza is not exactly the same as Bocce's, but it is close. Oh, and Nino's in West Seneca is real good 'za, too!
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Great memories - to me, Ted Darling did the best hockey play-by-play ever. For years, I had trouble listening to a hockey game with someone other than Ted (or RJ) doing the announcing. I still prefer to watch games on CBC rather than NBC because the play-by-play guys are just so much better. (Not to mention the between period analyses). In fact, even now when watching games, if a puck leaves the ice surface, I actually do my impression of Ted out loud: "The puck goes up and over the glass and into the crowd. Caught by a fan from Depew..." God bless Ted - he was awesome.
Geez, I don't know what we're going to do when RJ is no longer "Voice of the Sabres". God bless him, too!
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On 8/8/2018 at 2:12 PM, JujuFish said:
The problem with this statement is that that's simply not how acronyms work. I guarantee you that you don't pronounce laser, scuba, snafu, fubar, awol, radar, HMMWV, NATO, or any dozens of other examples by their full form pronunciations.
See, this is why I never save files as a .GIF, always a .JPG...or is that .JPEG? Dang!
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I say if the Sabres can't win any of the first five games, we pack it in and try for higher draft choices next year..... ?
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In order to score you have to be in the play. Also, I hate the idea of Vanek the first time around.
That's not true... it is as TrueBlue says below.
Here's the question. The definition of better as narrowly defined by where you finish the regular season, yes. If, however, you consider that it also does not guarantee a top 3 draft position in the following draft one might argue that it reduces your ability to improve the overall talent through the draft. As such, is finishing 26th more important than finishing 30th (or 31st really). I would prefer to finish dead last than finish 26th.
In fact, if you are not finishing within the top 20 and more importantly are not in the hunt for a wild card spot I would prefer to finish last.
Gee, I wonder where the Sabres' "culture of losing" is coming from. So, if we are in 20th place in March and 15 points out of a playoff spot, let's just fold up the tents and lose the rest of our games so we can move up a few spots in the draft. I'm sure that will go over well with the players and coaches who are trying to improve. No wonder we are in the position we are in. :blink:
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I did not vote in this poll, as the entire question of value brings up the specter of "Who should we keep/who could we trade". Unless it can be proven that one of them is the dark force that is eroding positive attitudes in the locker room, keep 'em both. I have no doubt that as the players around them play better, their performance will also rise. :thumbsup:
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Can anything other than a moribund franchise produce this sort of reaction? Would Hawk fans be talking like this? There's a whiff of desperation.
dudes, I object to being placed in the "I told you so" category. (Unless the "I told you so" would be "I told you not to count your chickens." I definitely won't be in the "I told you he'd suck" camp. I haven't said that, although I've definitely poked some people who've started counting the Norrises up.)
I guess I'm just agnostic on the guy. We'll see what happens. I'm hoping you're all right. I think a couple of things are driving this. I've noticed in the younger crowd that everything these days is "amazing." I have to try this recipe or that because it's "amazing." Superlatives have lost their meaning. There are too many "next big things."
Beyond that, there's the Internet, which allows hype to proliferate. Who benefits from this hype? Swedish hockey, the NHL, the Sabres, and of course Rasmus and his agent to some extent.
So, yeah, I'm an old guy shaking his fist at kids and their gizmos.
If this was 1987 and the Hockey News said it was so, I'd be very excited.
I concur with most of these statements. I've been watching NHL hockey for way too long to get overly excited about the "Next Big Thing". Whether that thing is a player, GM or franchise (except for Vegas, maybe), reality never quite seems to meet expectations. That being said, I hope I'm wrong and this kid turns out to be the Swedish Bobby Orr (minus the bad knees). If he becomes a steady presence on the blue line and can throw in a few goals and assists, I'd be alright with that too.
Recent past experience with this Sabres team has shown that you should never ignore the effect that team chemistry, coaching, etc. have on a new player. This could be a thread on its own, but just where did this team's "culture of losing" come from? Players? Coaches? Front Office? As Oddball from "Kelly's Heroes" would say, "Stop hittin' me with those negative waves, man! Woof, woof!"
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By sheer happenstance, I was introduced to Stranahan's Colorado Whiskey. 100% barley mash bill. Aged in previously used casks (sherry, bourbon, etc.) Very interesting flavor profile - unlike anything else I've tried. Not cheap, but I think worth the price.
Aside from their "standard" whiskey, they make two others: Diamond Peak (which I have not tried) and a sherry cask-aged version of their standard. I've tried the sherry cask aged - it has a wonderful bouquet and an utterly fascinating taste and finish. Whether drinking straight or mixed, the finish is extremely redolent of...baseball glove leather. That's right, baseball glove leather. Not leather from a book or a car seat (eeeeuww!), but from a brand-new baseball glove. I swear. Maybe that doesn't sound too appealing, but it is fascinating to experience.
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I know it's supposed to be Fantastic Friday, but the news of Anthony Bourdain's suicide today is just too much. Bourdain was a genuinely good dude, which is a really hard reputation to build when you're a celebrity who is on the road and working as much as he was. He leaves behind an 11 year old daughter and a legacy of being a super empathetic journalist and champion of this planet's diversity. Such a loss for the world.
Agreed - he seemed like he was the kind of guy you could run into at a bar, have a drink, a nosh and a great conversation with even if you didn't know him. He will be sorely missed.
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Yeah, yeah - Ovie won his Cup. Now he can go sit down somewhere and shut up. I never liked him or his style of play. And for whatever reason, I've always thought that the Caps were one of the most boring franchises in NHL history, and that includes this season. Vegas winning the Cup would've been a good story, but I only cheered for them because they weren't Washington. The season is (finally!) over - let's get to the draft and the awards and then concentrate on enjoying the summer. B-)
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When the short heat wave struck last week, I naturally turned on my central A/C so I could actually sleep that night. Of course, it was the first time it was on this season and...it wasn't working. At least not well. In 18 hours, the temp in the house only went from 83 to 79. I had my HVAC company stop by to take a look. Well, the issue was that there was no refrigerant left in the system. Due to a major leak. Caused by a piece of metal lodged in the plumbing. From the disintegrating impeller blades of the dying compressor. In short, the whole shebang needs to be replaced. Not fun. I'm now waiting for an estimate of what is going to cost to replace it. It dawned on me last night that as long as I am at it, I might consider replacing the furnace as well since they were installed at the same time. More $$$ going bye-bye. Happy summer. :blink:
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Until Eichel retires, the patient is still alive.
Eichel = Bass Pro. "Silver bullets" usually don't work. To build a team you have to build a team. Yes, the quality of the parts matter, but Eichel is still only 1/23rd of the team. Now with JBott in charge, maybe we can fill in the rest of the team with quality parts.
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The tank may be considered "successful", but the end game was always to build a Cup contender. To date, this has not occurred. Kind of like saying that the surgery was a success, but the patient died. Harrumph.
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Go Caps. No way do I want to see Vegas win the cup in their first season when we haven't won one in nearly half a century of existence.
There have been enough other teams that came into the NHL after Buffalo that have already won Cups (although not in their first season). I am pulling for the Golden Knights, as it shows that with the right choice of players and coaches that it doesn't take years of squirreling away draft picks to produce a Cup contender (and yes, I know that the entry draft meant positive extenuating circumstances for Vegas). More than anything, I think it has been the attitude of the Knights' players that have allowed them to go this far. There seem to be very few egos that need stroking in that locker room. They've elevated the team concept to a new height. I say that a Cup win for Vegas is a finger in the eye of every GM in the league who thinks it should take years of building a foundation to contend for the Cup. Good for Vegas. :thumbsup:
Oh, yeah.... and I don't like Ovie. :angry:
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I guess I don't get into the politics of the fan bases as much as you do. I'd like to see WPG in the finals because no expansion team should get there. I'd like to see Ovechkin graduate from the group of "best players to never win the Cup."
Um, all of the teams left in the playoffs are expansion teams; some have just been in the league longer than others.
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Vegas' skaters are playing well, but Fleury has been standing on his head. He's made some saves that no goalie (well, HUMAN goalie) should be capable of making. Some of his performances have been almost Hasek-like. Almost. Many a hockey pundit has said that to win the Cup, you need a hot goalie. Fleury is all that AND already has his name on the Cup. That experience will help the rest of the team.
Right now, the Golden Knights can go toe-to-toe with any of the teams still left in the hunt. I would not be at all shocked to see them in the Finals.
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Now we are talking some music! Although I grew up with what is now called "classic" rock, the 80s was when I had my first real job and these were the songs that were playing at the clubs when we would go out on the weekends. Lots of tasty stuff. I could toss out a list, but I'll just proffer a few (and maybe not so obscure):
The Cure - Hot Hot Hot!!!
The Stranglers - Golden Brown
Morrissey - Every Day is Like Sunday
Siouxsie & the Banshees - Cities in Dust
-EJ the DJ?
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Hmm...I don't recall that always wanting to be the middle of the pack is "having it my way". My point is that finishing somewhere in the middle of the pack right now is preferable to being dead last (in a season that was supposed to have us on the upswing). No, I was not satisfied constantly finishing mid-pack; I always hope for much better. I am just saying the the tank has yet to produce intended results AND if given a choice between a middling team that is entertaining to watch is preferable to the horror show of the last few seasons. Wake me when the nightmare is over...
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let me ask you this, without the tank -where would this team be right now? can you figure out any scenario that would make them anything more that a middle of the pack team?
You're kidding, right? Right now, I'd settle for middle of the pack. The last time I looked, the Sabres were dead frickin' last in the league. I think without the tank, we could still have easily managed to do that...
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The lineup is just one of the issues this organization has to address in the off-season (albeit the most important). There are issues with the arena, the "in-game experience", the front office, the AHL affiliate....well, the list goes on. Perhaps owning two major sports franchises is one too many for TP. There seems to be a general lack of focus in the entire Sabres' organization. Maybe now that attendance is finally tailing off and game tickets are selling for less on the secondary market than tickets to high school games, the powers that be will finally pay some attention. They've tread on the goodwill of their fan base for just a little too long.
Hey, the expansion team in Vegas has fewer losses than the Sabres have wins. I know that choosing players in an expansion draft is not the same as an established team trying to retool, but the dang Golden Knights are on top of their division. There should be more than a few embarrassed GMs around the league...
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What a crazy amazing performance by Red Gerard, a 17 year old American, who just won the USA first Gold this year in Men's Slopestyle Snowboarding. Simply amazing performance to stick everything on your 3rd and final run after wiping out on your two previous runs.
When I was 17, I couldn't find my a$$ with both hands - and I know I would never have the cojones to even attempt some of those crazy aerial stunts. This kid is awesome! Then, the next day he's seen hanging out watching the women's slopestyle, wearing a cool pair of sunglasses and chilling (literally) with his compatriots. In South Korea. Very cool. The furthest away from home I was at 17 was Montreal. (Heavy sigh B-))
OT — heard a funny one lately? Post it here.
in The Aud Club
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Thank you - don't forget to tip your server. I'll be here all week. Try the veal...