With expansion talk afoot, I used Franchise Hockey Manager to expand the league and never, ever stop. The experiment went horribly awry.

[Porous Five Hole]

“There’s been a lot of talk of expanding the NHL to 33 or 34 teams, which has some of you worried. What if it dilutes the product? What if it makes it impossible for most teams to ever contend? But I have a different question. Why stop at one or two teams? Why stop at all?
 

We live in a maximalist age, one where continued growth and profits are demanded at all costs. And so, using Franchise Hockey Manager, I will keep expanding the NHL every season until I break either the game or the sport…”

 

“2026/27: Everyone say hello to the… uh, Milwaukee Mounties. Feels like a bit of a caricature, but whatever. Forget supposedly hot markets like Houston, or cherished ones like Quebec City — this is where FHM says the NHL must go.”

 

”2032/33: The Portland Fire Dogs join the league, and while I’m unclear why Portland has chosen to honour the humble Dalmatian, it’s nice to have some proper PNW representation in the Pacific. Unfortunately, Portland is easily the worst team to join the league so far, going a dire 16-57-9. That’s what happens when your star player is Xavier Bourgault. Did I mention that FHM’s logo for the Fire Dogs is a fire hydrant?”

 

”Some might say that enough is enough. But Gary Bettman, now 82 and contemplating, as we all must, the legacy we will leave behind, has a revelation during the NHL Awards held at beautiful Virginia Beach. We must not only grow the game, but pick up the pace of that growth. We must now add two teams a year. Expansion will continue until morale improves.”

Enjoy the long form story. I won’t spoil which year the Sabres win the Cup. 

Edited August 6 by Porous Five Hole

[Hawerchuk]

Your post Immediately reminded me of the classic BASEketball scene. LMAO!!

 

Dan Patrick: Hi there. I'm Dan Patrick.

Kenny Mayne: And I'm Kenny Mayne.

Dan Patrick: With the first seven months of the BASEketball postseason out of the way, the playoff picture is now starting to emerge.

Kenny Mayne: So, with last night's victory over Boston, next week the Beers must beat Indianapolis in order to advance to Charlotte. That's in an effort to reduce their magic number to three.

Dan Patrick: Right, and then the Beers can advance to the National Eastern Division North to play Tampa.

Kenny Mayne: So, if the Beers beat Detroit and Denver beats Atlanta in the American Southwestern Division East Northern, then Milwaukee goes to the Denslow Cup, unless Baltimore can upset Buffalo and Charlotte ties Toronto, then Oakland would play LA and Pittsburgh in a blind choice round robin. And if no clear winner emerges from all of this, the two-man sack race will be held on consecutive Sundays until a champion can be crowned.

Dan Patrick: Right.

[Doohickie]

3 hours ago, Porous Five Hole said:

 2027/28: Everyone welcome the Fort Worth Polecats. In the Metro. Okay, Gary/FHM. 

We here in Fort Worth proven we can't even begin to support an NLL team.  No way we could prop up an NHL team.

You want a cross-town rival for the Stars?  Try Plano.

Plano/McKinney has a bigger metro population than Buffalo/Niagara.

[Doohickie]

Oh, skip all that.  The Stars have announced a new arena in Plano.

[Pimlach]

What if it dilutes the product?
 

Expansion will dilute the product that is already diluted right now   

What if it makes it impossible for most teams to ever contend?

it will and it has.  
 

But I have a different question. Why stop at one or two teams? Why stop at all?

crazy talk.  No expansion is needed.  None.  

[Taro T]

12 minutes ago, Pimlach said:

What if it dilutes the product?
 

Expansion will dilute the product that is already diluted right now   

What if it makes it impossible for most teams to ever contend?

it will and it has.  
 

But I have a different question. Why stop at one or two teams? Why stop at all?

crazy talk.  No expansion is needed.  None.  

IMHO, there's something elegant with 32 teams.  The RS eliminates exactly 50% of the remaining (which at that point is all 32) teams and each playoff round eliminates exactly 50% of those remaining teams.

Hate the idea of going to 33+ teams.

That guarantees at least 1 team, and likely many, have to wait 1/3 of a century to win their next (or 1st, which would still be their next) Stanley Cup.

[#freejame]

3 hours ago, Doohickie said:

We here in Fort Worth proven we can't even begin to support an NLL team.  No way we could prop up an NHL team.

You want a cross-town rival for the Stars?  Try Plano.

Plano/McKinney has a bigger metro population than Buffalo/Niagara.

Lots of shipments rolling in and out of McKinney these days

[#freejame]

1 hour ago, Pimlach said:

What if it dilutes the product?
 

Expansion will dilute the product that is already diluted right now   

What if it makes it impossible for most teams to ever contend?

it will and it has.  
 

But I have a different question. Why stop at one or two teams? Why stop at all?

crazy talk.  No expansion is needed.  None.  

The game is more skilled than it’s ever been and teams have more skill than ever before. Is there a larger gap between good teams and bad teams? Maybe. Is there enough skill in the league to support 36 teams (which I think is the end goal)? Probably. 

[Porous Five Hole]

1 hour ago, Pimlach said:

What if it dilutes the product?
 

Expansion will dilute the product that is already diluted right now   

What if it makes it impossible for most teams to ever contend?

it will and it has.  
 

But I have a different question. Why stop at one or two teams? Why stop at all?

crazy talk.  No expansion is needed.  None.  

lol he expanded to 100 teams. It was just a joke. 

[Eleven]

3 hours ago, Doohickie said:

 

Plano/McKinney has a bigger metro population than Buffalo/Niagara.

As I recently wrote in another thread:  Just because the Sabres' TV license stops at the border doesn't mean the metro population does.

[Pimlach]

4 hours ago, #freejame said:

The game is more skilled than it’s ever been and teams have more skill than ever before. Is there a larger gap between good teams and bad teams? Maybe. Is there enough skill in the league to support 36 teams (which I think is the end goal)? Probably. 

More skill today?  Yes.   But there are still only a limited number of difference maker cornerstone players.  A large majority of teams won’t have any.  But worse is that there aren’t enough quality NHL goalies for the 32 teams we have now.  Adding new teams?  I vote no. 

[Doohickie]

8 hours ago, #freejame said:

Lots of shipments rolling in and out of McKinney these days

[Doohickie]

7 hours ago, Eleven said:

As I recently wrote in another thread:  Just because the Sabres' TV license stops at the border doesn't mean the metro population does.

Sure, but 99% of the fans that go to the Sabres games from across the border are rooting for the visiting Leafs, Habs or Sens.

[#freejame]

5 hours ago, Doohickie said:

It’s turning into a large freight hub 

[#freejame]

9 hours ago, Pimlach said:

More skill today?  Yes.   But there are still only a limited number of difference maker cornerstone players.  A large majority of teams won’t have any.  But worse is that there aren’t enough quality NHL goalies for the 32 teams we have now.  Adding new teams?  I vote no. 

Hasn’t it always been true that there is a limited number of difference making cornerstones? That’s why there’s good teams and bad teams. As far as goaltending is concerned, I don’t think anyone would complain about a higher scoring league. I wouldn’t say I’m pro expansion, but Gary wants to have 30 US teams and I’ve accepted that. 

[Doohickie]

6 hours ago, #freejame said:

It’s turning into a large freight hub 

That's DFW in general. Ridgmar Mall in Ft Worth is going to be turned into a logistics center.